I Love Chinese Food!

This I just had to buy. Why? It was soooo cheap at only a few pennies, and just look at it- how could I give up the opportunity to document such an amazing product for the entire world to gaze at in wonderment? I haven't eaten it yet, if that's what you're wondering. I'm waiting for some brave soul to try it first. Come on over to China and visit me- maybe it could be you!

The Chinese basically just means "Shredded Meat Roll"... Yummy!

Bizarro Club M

For those who don't know, my current abode (Fort Awesome- Asian Operations Unit) has come to be known as Club M, due to the three of us living here going by the code names of Matt, Matt, and Max. In an unrelated note, I recently re-discovered the wonders of the little camera attatched to the screen of my laptop. Amongst the most recent set of photos, there were (as always, of course!) a few gems. I thought these three in particular kind of look like I'm a mad scientist, and Matt and Max are my mongoloid henchmen (is it P.C. to use the term "mongoloid" in a blog about China?). For your veiwing pleasure:

The Brains:

The Brawn:

Not that it couldn't be said that all of these pictures look kind of like rejects, but here are a few of the more hilarious rejects:

Max is too happy, lets not talk about my nose, and who in the world are those 2 super hicks?
Can you even tell what's wrong with the one on the far left?

Swimming With Song Qingling

It's really been great having my dad here for the past few days. We've had the chance to get out of the city and head to the Fragrant Hills for a beautiful, albeit cold Sunday afternoon, eaten at numerous restaraunts, he's even accompanied me to some of my classes! The other day we went to see the former residence of 宋庆龄 (Song Qing Ling), the most famous of Sun Yatsen's wives (President of the Republic of China pre-Chiang Kaishek). The mansion was beautiful and relatively empty due to the below freezing temperatures. The real attraction, though, was to be found outside the mansion's protective stone lions, across the street on the banks of one of Beijing's three man-made lakes, Houhai.
There were 10 or 15 middle-aged and older men milling about in varying states of clothedness, some of them wearing only their skivvies. Upon going over to check out what was going on, we found that they were swimming in a hole they'd hacked out of the ice. I took some pictures and we chatted with them for a while, learning that the reason the water in this particular area was warm was because it flows from the Summer Palace. Hmmmm.... Let's not get into a discussion of Chinese logic again...

This old man is tougher than you.

The ice melted his face off!!
I felt like he was sucking the heat straight out of my body

Just as I was packing up my stuff to go, my dad came up and asked that I give him "three reasons not to take a dip". I was at a loss to come up with even one, and so the fun began. He borrowed a pair of swimming trunks from a more-than-willing old Chinese man, and in he went!

The first tentative steps onto the slippery ladder

I'm not sure if he's on the way in or the way out here,
but either way, it sure looks cold!

Stunned Chinese men lined up along the handrail at the edge of the lake to gawk, as my father, the Lao Wai, took a dip. There was much cheering and shouting- most of the shouting coming from my dad- I don't think any of them had expected to see a spectacle like this today, come to think of it, neither did I! I think he lasted for a minute or so before the cold became too much to bear, then he climbed back up the slippery ladder to be greeted by the applause of the entire crowd (which by then had at least doubled in size).

The champion triumphantly emerges to greet his fans

Who greet him with open arms and dry towels

Including his biggest fan!

All in all, a good time was had by everyone lucky enough to be walking by at that particular moment!

This guy certainly approves!

The Heat is on!

Man, it has been really cold the last few days! Regardless of winter having already officially started in China about a month ago, the first we've really felt it was this saturday. 8 below zero celsius- but it's not the tempurature that kills you- it's the frigid wind off the Mongolian plains. I think the windchill factor must be around a brazilian below zero (though I remember a Fox News expose in 2000 or 2001 claiming windchill is a myth, but what do they know anyways?).
Here's a picture of the smokestack coming out of our public heat utility- that billow of innocent-looking white smoke is a constand reminder to me on my way home that my apartment will be filled with oil-fueled forced-hot-water heat whether I like it or not. But I like it, I like it!

Beacon of a Warm Apartment (That's my beige building looming on the near left)

More fun with translation

Sorry I don't have anything more interesting to contribute, I've been leaving my digital camera at home and just taking film lately, but I'll be back on top of my blogging again soon, rest assured! So, with that said, on to the task at hand. The Chinese word 避难 translates literally as "avoid disaster" which takes on the actual definitions of "take refuge; seek asylum" when used as a verb, and, predictably, when used as a noun it means "refuge; sanctuary; asylum; funk hole"... wait, "funk hole"!? Isn't that what they found Saddam in? Maybe not, but it definitely sounds kinda dirty.
In other exciting language news, I've recently started learning some chinese webspeak. The current winner: "3x" can you guess what that means? Probably not, so I'll tell you. It means "Thanks" because the word for "3" is "san" and "sanx" sounds a lot like a chinese person saying thanks in english. Self deprecating Chinese humour? who knew....